[DeathbyDuplicity]

Here's a couple a pieces of shit I found wihile browsing, I thought they where pretty funny!

Little Tom

Little Tom was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered
over the fence.Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up
to, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Tom?"
"My goldfish died," replied Tom tearfully, without looking up, "and I've
just buried him."
The neighbor was concerned.
"That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"
Tom patted down the last heap of earth then replied, "that's because
he's inside your fucking cat

The Difference

An eight year old boy comes home from school and says "Daddy! Daddy!
What is the difference between a pussy and a cunt?" The dad says, "No, I
cant tell you that! You're too young!" The son goes, "NO I'm not daddy!
Please tell me." So the father says alright and takes the boy into the
bedroom. When they walk into the room, the boys mother is fast asleep.
So the dad pulls back the covers, and like always, the mother is lying
there without any panties on. The father points in between her legs and
says, "You see that? That's a pussy!" The son asks, "Oooo! Can I pet
it?" The father reply's, "NO! You'll wake up the cunt!"

Burger

A rather attractive woman goes up to the register in an upscale hamburger

establishment. She gestures alluringly to a large man who comes over

immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he

should bring his face close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently

caress is cheek, which is slowly turning a crimson red. "Are you the

owner?" she asks, now softly stroking his face with both hands. Actually,

"No" he replies. "I'm just the manager." "Can you get him for me? I need

to speak to him." She asks, running her hands up beyond his ears and

into his hair. "I'm afraid I can't," breathes the manager clearly aroused,

"he's in the back doing taxes right now. Is there anything I can do?" "Yes,

there is. I need you to give him a message." She continues huskily,

popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them

gently. "Tell him" she says "that there is no toilet paper or hand soap in

the ladies room."

Kenney the Rooster

Well, Kenny the rooster costs a lot of money, but the farmer decides he'd
be worth it. So, he buys Kenny.
The farmer takes Kenny home and sets him down in the barnyard, first,
giving the rooster a pep talk.
I want you to pace yourself now. You've got a lot of chickens to service
here, and you cost me a lot of money. Consequently, I'll need you to do a
good job. So, take your time and have some fun," the farmer said, with a
chuckle.
Kenny seemed to understand, so the farmer pointed toward the Hen house and
Kenny took off like a shot. WHAM!- Kenny nails every hen in the hen house-
three or four times, and the farmer is really shocked. After that the
farmer hears a commotion in the duck pen, sure enough, Kenny is in there.
Later, the farmer sees Kenny after a flock of geese, down by the lake. Once
again - WHAM! He gets all the geese.
By sunset he sees Kenny out in the fields chasing quail and pheasants. The
farmer is distraught and worried that his expensive rooster won't even last
24 hours. Sure enough, the farmer goes to bed and wakes up the next day, to
find Kenny on his back, stone cold in the middle of the yard. Buzzards are
circling overhead.
The farmer, saddened by the loss of such a colorful and expensive animal,
shakes his head and says, "Oh, Kenny, I told you to pace yourself. I tried
to get you to slow down, now look what you've done to yourself."
Kenny opens one eye, nods toward the buzzards circling in the sky and says,
"Shhh, they're getting closer".

Well if y'all find some post em!! heheheh!

[faustgfx]

"doh" ?



------------------
the not so resident caustic bitch, and the owls turned back the way they are.. even the foos ain't trippin' no more. 35983387 / [email protected]

[psi burn]

that one about the lady was actually funny
heres a joke my aunt taught me...

the milk poured into the glass.

try to contain yourself, i got a headache from laughing when i first heard it.

[Spitfire]

The milk poured into the glass?

I must be dense...

[mantis]

Jesus Christ and Moses are bored in heaven so they decide to go down to earth and relive some of their good times. They arrive near a lake, Moses looks at it, and parts the water.
He says: "Boy, it feels great to do that again!"
Jesus starts walking across the lake, but after going out about 20 feet, he sinks.
He swims back to shore and Moses asks: "What happened?"
Jesus replies: "Last time I walked on water I didn't have these holes in my feet!"

[DeathbyDuplicity]

Here's a joke and a question...
If your ass was on fire!!
A. Would you let it burn off?
or B. Would you put it out and be severely burned for life?

Just wondering, cause I've got a couple of sparkies and was looking for a little entertainment! Any takers? hehehh!

[Spitfire]

This one allways kills me :One day Mrs. Jones went to have a talk with the minister at the local
church. "Reverend," she said, "I have a problem, my husband keeps falling
asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing. What should I do?"

"I have an idea," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you. I will be
able to tell when Mr. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you at
specific times. When I motion, you give him a good poke in the leg."

In church the following Sunday, Mr. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the
preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for
you?" he said, nodding to Mrs.Jones.

"Jesus!", Jones cried as his wife jabbed him the leg with the hatpin.

"Yes, you are right, Mr. Jones," said the minister. Soon, Mr. Jones nodded
off again. Again, the minister noticed. "Who is your redeemer?" he asked
the congregation, motioning towards Mrs. Jones.

"God!" Mr. Jones cried out as he was stuck again with the hatpin.

"Right again," said the minister, smiling. Before long, Mr. Jones again
winked off. However, this time the minister did not notice. As he picked
up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few motions that Mrs. Jones mistook
as signals to bayonet her husband with the hatpin again.

The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his
99th son?"

Mrs. Jones poked her husband, who yelled, "You stick that goddamned thing
in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it up your ass!"

"Amen," replied the congregation.

[Spitfire]

A country preacher decided to skip services one Sunday and head
to the hills to do some bear hunting. As he rounded the corner
on a perilous twist in the trail, he and a bear collided,
sending him and his rifle tumbling down the mountainside. Before
he knew it, his rifle went one way and he went the other,
landing on a rock and breaking both legs. That was the good
news. The bad news was the ferocious bear charging at him from a
distance, and he couldn't move. "Oh, Lord," the preacher prayed,
"I'm so sorry for skipping services today to come out here and
hunt. Please forgive me and grant me just one wish...please make
a Christian out of that bear that's coming at me. Please, Lord!"

That very instant, the bear skidded to a halt, fell to its
knees, clasped its paws together and began to pray aloud right
at the preacher's feet. "Dear God, bless this food I am about to
receive...."

[DeathbyDuplicity]

That's some funny shit Spitfire!! I almost spit orange juice out my fucking nose when I read the first! The second one is fun to! Church is also funny! heheheh! Church! heheeh!

[Lukias]

In the beginning!
Start with a cage containing five monkeys. Inside the cage, hang a banana on a string from the ceiling and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the monkeys with ice-cold water. After a while, another monkey makes an attempt with the same result - all the monkeys are sprayed with ice-cold water. Pretty soon, when yet another monkey can't resist trying to climb the stairs, all the other monkeys aggressively try to prevent it. Now, turn off the cold water, remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and immediately wants to climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys attack him. He tries again and is attacked again. He realizes that if he tries to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted. Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer too, takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm. Again, replace a third original monkey with a new one. The new one makes it to the stairs and is attacked by all. Two of the four monkeys that beat him up have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs, or why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey. After replacing the fourth and fifth original monkeys, all the monkeys that have been sprayed with cold water will have been replaced. Nevertheless, without knowing the real reason why, no monkey will ever approach the stairs again. Why not? Because as far as they know that's the way it's always been around here.
And that's how Company Policy begins..........

Not really a joke....but hey.


Dave walks into a bar and sees John sitting at the end of the bar counter with a great big smile on his face Dave says "John what are you so happy for?""Well Dave, I gotta tell ya... Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat, just waxin'my boat, and a redhead came up to me... tits out to here, Dave, tits out tohere!She says "Can I have a ride in your boat?" I said 'Sure you can have a ride inmy boat.' So I took her way out, Dave. I turned off the key and I said 'Itseither screw or swim!'She couldn't swim, Dave, she couldn't swim!!."The next day Dave walks into a bar and sees John sitten at the end of the barcounter with a bigger smile on his face. Dave says "What are you so happy abouttoday John?""Well Dave... I gotta tell ya... Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat, just waxin'my boat and a BEAUTIFUL blond came up to me... tits out to here, Dave, tits outto here!She said 'Can I have a ride in your boat?' "Sure you can have a ride in myboat." So I took her way out, Dave, way out much further than the last one.I turned off the key and I said 'Its either screw or swim!' She couldn't swim!!,Dave, she couldn't swim!!!!."A couple days pass and Dave walks into a bar and sees John down there cryin overa beer. Dave says "John, what are you so sad for?" "Well Dave, I gotta tell ya.... Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat, just waxin'my boat, and the most desirable brunette came up to me... tits WAY out to here,Dave, tits WAY out to here.I had more wood than my boat does. She says "Can I have a ride in your boat?""Sure you can have a ride in my boat. "So I took her way out, Dave, way WAYout... much further than the last two. I turned off the key, and looked at hertits and said 'Its either screw or swim!!'. She pulled down her pants.... shehad a dick, Dave!!! She had a great BIG dick!!!And Dave, I CAN'T SWIM, CAN'T SWIM DAVE!!!"

[DeathbyDuplicity]

Poot! heheheheh!

[DaveT]

What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe?

Roberto

How do you get 100 pikachus onto a bus?

You Pokemon

And now for a slightly more morbid one:

Whats 12 inches long and gets women screaming in the morning?

Cot death

------------------
Eh.. CHILL WINSTON! booyakasha!http://d-f-b.webjump.com

[DeathbyDuplicity]

Whats 12 inches long and gets women screaming in the morning?

A ruler hoisted up her ass! heheheh!

[el tigre]

Two fat guys walk into a pub.

Fat guy 1 says to Fat guy 2 "Your round, mate"

Fat guy 2 says "So are you ya fat cunt!"

I found it amusing :�

------------------
Does anyone know the secret formula? :�

[ceenda]

One day Bob and Joe decide to go fishing, so they walk off looking for a good spot to start their fishing. As they are crossing the local bridge they stop and realise that they have neither a fishing rod or tackle.

However, luck is at hand as a passer by asks them why they are looking so perplexed.

"The thing is" says Bob to the passer by, "is that we've come here to do some fishing, but have left our equipment at home".

"Aah", the man replies, "well, Bob, you grab Joe's ankles and hold him upside down over the side of the bridge and when a fish comes along grab it!!!" So, Bob grabs Joe's ankles and holds him over the side of the bridge.

An hour goes by.
Bob calls down to Joe
"Have you caught any fish yet?"
"No!" comes the reply.

Another hour goes by.
Bob calls down to Joe
"Have you caught any fish yet?"
"No!" comes the reply.

Another hour goes by.
Bob calls down to Joe
"Have you caught any fish yet?"
"No Bob, but pull me up there's a train coming!!!"

[psi burn]

ok, this one made me crack up when i was little. its kinda dorky now, but hey....


there were 3 guys. shutup, trouble, and manners. trouble got lost in the woods, so shutup and manners went to the police station. shutup went inside, and manners stayed outside. shutup approached a police officer and said, "yes my friend is missing".
the cop says "ok, whats your name?". "shutup". "huh? give me your name". "shutup". "hey, are you looking for trouble?!". "yes". "where are your manners?!". "outside."

eh, yea :]

[psi burn]

k i just reread that and its retarded but if anyone here is in 3rd grade you'll get a kick out of it. ok heres another i heard which is pretty neat if you're clever and understand it. i'm probably messing it up as i cant remember these things, so it might not be as funny as possible, but here we go...

jake is playing golf. some man catches up to his hole, and notices jake has stopped and is staring at something. he says "whats the matter?". jake says he's looking into his house beyond the golf course and saw a man walk into his house, with his wife in there. the other guy says, want me to see whats up? jake says, sure. the guy reaches into his bag and pulls out a gun with a scope attached. jake says, "what the?!". the guy states he's a sniper. he peers through the scope and spots his wife with the other man in their bedroom. the man discovers the two were obviously cheating on jake, and tells him. jake says "what?! thats it, can you do me a favor? i want you to kill my wife. shoot her in the head." the man says, ok, but each one of my shots cost 1,000 dollars. jake says "ok, and i want you to shoot the other man in his dick, i know its his favorite part of his body, that ego of his!" the man says ok. he steady's the gun, and looks through the scope. he waits and waits and waits. jake asks, "whats taking so long??". the man tells him to hold on. he waits more. jake says, "what are you waiting for??". the man replies, "im about to save you 1,000 dollars".

ok its not as funny since i got the whole storyline/plot wrong, i only nailed the ending. well uh, if you're smart or have past puberty you'd realize why he was about to save jake 1,000 dollars.

well thats all the jokes this brain knows.

:X

[Lukias]

I sincerly (spelling) apologise for the length of this....fairly good though...we'll..

They don't call it the help desk for nothing...
A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The tech asked her if she was "running it under Windows." The woman then responded, "No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his is working fine."
*********************************************************
Tech Support: "OK Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter 'P' to bring up the Program Manager."
Customer: "I don't have a 'P'."
Tech Support: "On your keyboard, Bob."
Customer: "What do you mean?"
Tech Support: "'P' on your keyboard, Bob."
Customer: "I'm not going to do that!"
*********************************************************
Overheard in a computer shop: Customer: "I'd like a mouse mat, please." Salesperson: "Certainly sir, we've got a large variety." Customer: "But will they be compatible with my computer?"
********************************************************
I once received a fax with a note on the bottom to fax the document back to the sender when I was finished with it, because he needed to keep it.
*******************************************************
Customer: "Can you copy the Internet for me on this diskette?"
*******************************************************
I work for a local ISP. Frequently we receive phone calls that start something like this: Customer: "Hi. Is this the Internet?"
*********************************************************
Some people pay for their online services with checks made payable to "The Internet."
********************************************************* Customer: "So that'll get me connected to the Internet, right?"
Tech Support: "Yeah."
Customer: "And that's the latest version of the Internet, right?"
Tech Support: "Uhh...uh...uh...yeah."
*********************************************************
For a computer programming class, I sat directly across from someone, and our computers were facing away from each other. A few minutes into the class, she got up to leave the room. I reached between our computers and switched the inputs for the keyboards.
She came back and started typing and immediately got a distressed look on her face. She called the teacher over and explained that no matter what she typed, nothing would happen. The teacher tried everything.
By this time I was hiding behind my monitor and quaking red-faced. I started to type, "Leave me alone!"
They both jumped back, silenced. What the..." the teacher said.
I typed, "I said leave me alone!"
The kid got real upset. "I didn't do anything to it, I swear!"
It was all I could do to keep from laughing out loud. The conversation between them and HAL 2000 went on for an amazing five minutes.
Me: "Don't touch me!"
Her: "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hit your keys that hard."
Me: "Who do you think you are anyway?!" etc...
Finally, I couldn't contain myself any longer and fell out of my chair laughing. After they had realized what I had done, they both turned beet red. Funny, I never got more than a C grade in that class.
*********************************************************
Tech Support: "All right...now double-click on the File Manager icon."
Customer: "That's why I hate this Windows - because of the icons - I'm a Protestant, and I don't believe in icons."
Tech Support: "Well, that's just an industry term sir. I don't believe it was meant to -"
Customer: "I don't care about any 'Industry Terms'. I don't believe in icons."
Tech Support: "Well...why don't you click on the 'little picture' of a filing cabinet...is 'little picture' OK?"
Customer: [click]
*********************************************************
Customer: "Your sound card is defective and I want a new one."
Tech Support: "What seems to be the problem?"
Customer: "The balance is backwards. The left channel is coming out of the right speaker and the right channel is coming out the left. It's defective."
Tech Support: "You can solve the problem by moving the left speaker to the right side of the machine and vice versa."
Customer: (sputter) (click)
Tech Support: (snicker)
*********************************************************
I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard's DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn't solve: She could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine, which truly baffled me because the only true colors are cyan, magenta, and yellow.
For instance, green is a combination of cyan and yellow, but green printed fine. Every color of the rainbow printed fine except for yellow. I had the customer change ink cartridges. I had the customer delete and reinstall the drivers. Nothing worked. I asked my co-workers for help; they offered no new ideas.
After over two hours of troubleshooting, I was about to tell the customer to send the printer in to us for repair when she asked quietly, "Should I try printing on a piece of white paper instead of this yellow construction paper?"
Sometimes the user can teach us a thing or two about tech support.
*********************************************************
A man attempting to set up his new printer called the printer's tech support number, complaining about the error message: "Can't find the printer." On the phone, the man said he even held the printer up in front of the screen, but the computer still couldn't find it.
***************************************************
An unfailingly polite lady called to ask for help with a Windows installation that had gone terribly wrong.
Customer: "I brought my Windows disks from work to install them on my home computer." [Training stresses that we are "not the Software Police," so I let the little act of piracy slide...]
Tech Support: "Umm-hmm. What happened?"
Customer: "As I put each disk in it turns out they weren't initialized."
Tech Support: "Do you remember the message exactly, ma'am?"
Customer proudly) "I wrote it down. 'This is not a Macintosh disk. Would you like to initialize it?'"
Tech Support: "Er, what happened next?"
Customer: "After they were initialized all the disks appeared to be blank. And now I brought them back to work, and I can't read them in the A: drive; the PC wants to format them. And this is our only set of Windows disks for the whole office. Did I do something wrong?"
********************************************************
I have a friend who just bought a computer and was instructed to load a program by typing "A:" and then the name of the program. My friend told me it would not work because his keyboard was no good. He said he couldn't type the "dot over dot thingie" and that every time he tried to type the "dot over dot thingie" he kept getting the "dot over comma thingie" no matter how careful he was to press only on the very top of the key. When I taught him about the shift key, he thought I was a genius.
******************************************************
I received this Email from a friend: "CanYouFixTheSpaceBarOnMyKeyboard?"


Got lots more....interested?.
Be back on Monday (Sunday for most of you guys) got copious amounts of acoholic beverage to consume over the weekend.

Ave a good one!

[Lukias]

Oh sorry....not a joke, but all in humours sake...you understand.

[Lukias]

Take it from me, wrinkle cream doesn't work. I've been using it for two years and my balls still look like raisins.

(shit, I hope I'm not the only one)

[Hurri-cane]

" how do i rewind this floppy disk ? "

it will be solved, said the man while shitting in the bathtub.....

so boring ahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaaahahahhaha

.caneman

[psi burn]

thanks chapel, how'd you find it? a kid told the joke last year in a P.E. class, pretty weird you'd happen to stumble across it on the net

lukias, those were making me rofl. are all those situations true?

[Chapel]

hey psi I found that joke on the net.. here it is

One morning, a man approached the first tee, only to find another guy
approaching from the other side. They began talking and decided to play 9
holes together. After teeing off, they sat off down the fairway,
continuing their chat. "What do you do?" the first man asked. "I'm a
salesman. What about you?" "I'm a hitman for the mob," replied the second
man. The hitman noticed that the 1st guy started getting a little nervous
and continued. "Yeah. I'm the highest paid guy in the business. I'm the
best." He stopped, sat down his bag of clubs, and pulled out a fancy, high
powered rifle that was loaded with all types of scopes and sights. He than
asked the man where he lived. Still nervous the man replied, "In a
subdivision just west of here." The hitman placed the gun against his
shoulder, faced west, peered into a scope and asked "What color roof ya'
got?" "Gray." Then he asked "What color siding?" "Yellow." "You got a
silver Toyota?" "Yeah," replied the first man who was now completely
amazed by the accuracy of the hitman's equipment. "That's my wife's
car." "That your red pickup next to it?" Looking baffled the man asked
if he could look through the scope. Looking through the sights, he
said "Hell. That's my buddy Jeff's truck. What the hell is he doing there
if I'm..?"

The hitman looked through the scope once more. "Your wife a
blond?" "Yeah." "Your buddy got black hair?" "Yeah!" "Well, I don't
know how to tell you, but I think you've got a problem. They're going at
it like a couple of teenagers in there." said the hitman. "Problem??!
THEY'VE got the problem! I want you to shoot both of them! Right now!"
The hitman paused and said, "Sure. But it'll cost you. Like I said, I'm
the best. I get paid $5,000 per shot." "I don't care! Just do it! I want
you to shoot her right in the head, then shoot him right in the balls!"
The hitman agreed, turned, and took firing position. He carefully stared
into the sights, taking careful aim. He then said, "You know what buddy.
This is your lucky day. I think I can save you $5,000!"

[Chapel]

A blonde arrived for her first golf lesson and the pro asked her to take a
swing at a ball to see how she'd do. The blonde did so and competely duffed the shot. The pro said "Your swing is good but you're gripping the
club too hard - grip the club gently as you would your husband's penis.".
The blonde took another shot and nailed the ball 275 yards straight down
the fairway. The pro said "That was excellent!! Let's try it again only
this time take the club out of your mouth."

[Lukias]

PSI BURN - Yeah apparently so, though there's no proof of this and ya can't trust anything you receive via email. Mind you I do tech support and believe me there's so stupid individuals out there e.g Q."Is it plugged in?" A. "How do you know that" - that's one of my favorites.
I've got some more jokes on the way (all in bad taste...of course).

[Lukias]

Three boys received their grades from their female sex education instuctor. One got a D+ the second a D- and the third an F.
"One day we'll get her for this" said the first boy.
"I agree, we'll grab her..." said the second.
"Yeah" said the third "and then we'll kick her in the nuts!

There's this guy who has been stranded on a deserted island,
all alone for 10 years. One day he sees a speck on the horizon. He
thinks to himself, "It's not a ship." The speck gets a little closer
and he thinks, "It's not a boat." The speck gets even closer and he
thinks, "It's not a raft.
Then, out of the surf comes this gorgeous blonde woman
wearing a wet suit and SCUBA gear.
She comes up to the guy and says, "How long has it been since
you've had a cigarette?" "Ten years!" he says. She reaches over
and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack
of fresh cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag, and
says, "Man, oh man! Is that good!"
Then she asked, "How long has it been since you've had a nice
cold beer?" He replies, "Oh, God, it's been at least 10 years!"
She reaches over, unzips the waterproof pocket on her right sleeve,
pulls out a dry ice pack from around an ice cold beer, hands
it to him and watches as he take a long swig and says, "Wow, that's
fantastic!"
Then she starts unzipping the long zipper that runs down the
front of her wet suit and she says to him, "And how long has it been
since you've had some REAL fun?" And the man replies, "Good God,
woman! Don't tell me you've got golf clubs in there!"

[Spitfire]

Hahhaha priceless...

What's that joke again of the 2 guys and the girl that are stranded on the deserted island without food?

[Lukias]

Not sure? Though I wonder what they had to munch on...?
I'm on the warpath for more jokes. Must.keep..this...thread......alive

[Lukias]

Q. How do you get rid of unwanted pubic hair?

A. Spit it out


Little Johny is celebrating his seventh birthday. His parents ask him "what do you want
for your birthday?". He says, "I wanna watch."
So they let him


Q. What do you do when your girlfriend starts smoking?

A. Slow down and use a lubricant

[Lukias]

Somewhere in the galaxy Luke and Darth are in the midst of battle when Darth speaks out
"Luke submit to the power of the dark side".
"Surely it can't be that powerful reply's Luke".
"Indeed it is, for example, I know what your getting for christmas".
Luke "How do you know that?"
"I felt your presents"


Young 2nd grader Tim comes home from school and walks straight to his father "dad I had sex with my teacher today".
"Why Tim" says dad puffing his chest out "I'm so proud of you". "I didn't have sex with my teacher untill I was in 4th grade". "You know what" says dad "what" reply's Tim. "That red bike you've always wanted...where going to go out right now and buy it for you"
"Can we wait a couple of days dad.....
....my arse is still sore"


Enjoy my fellow comrades.....enjoy!!