Sijun Forums :: View topic - Woman in corset...need feedback *update 3*

andreasrocha · Posted: Tue Jul 06, 2004 3:13 pm

Hi there

I present to you one of my last works. What do you think? What can be improved?

CYA

aphelionart · Posted: Tue Jul 06, 2004 4:17 pm

hm looks pretty good! one thing i might say is the anatomy on the neck seems a little strange.. also the head is so vertical and the face so emotionless, it's kind of distracting.. mh.
-matt

blackshtef · Posted: Wed Jul 07, 2004 1:11 pm

I like it a lot Exclamation

Good work!
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andreasrocha · Posted: Wed Jul 07, 2004 2:39 pm

Based on comments from forums and friends I made a couple of improvements. Now that I compare this new version with the old one, I can see how wrong the face was (something I did not notice before.) It's funny how involved you can get with a painting up to a point where you cannot see errors. Probably, this second version also has mistakes I am not seeing, but that is why I need your feedback.

Thanks!

rec|use · member Member # Joined: 02 Jul 2004 Posts: 74

A huge improvement! Shocked

No crits from me Smile

nice work.

bagelguillotine · Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2004 2:05 pm

She's starting to look like she's made of rubber...try making the lights a little more subtle, and don't be afraid of sharper shadows. The area just under the breasts is really nice as well as the eyes... Like it a lot!

patrick · Posted: Sat Jul 10, 2004 4:15 pm

I like the redo a lot better, but I have to agree that the area between the neck and mid breast look strangely out of focus compared to the rest.
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andreasrocha · Posted: Sun Jul 11, 2004 2:25 am

After considering some of the comments, I thought it would be better to head into a different direction, so I tried a more spontaneous approach. The woman was becoming too "plastic" This is what I came up with, but it is not finished. I am curious to know what you think. I believe that most of you dislike this one compared to the last. Do you think I should rework the last version or go on with this new one?

Thanks for everybody's comments. They help a lot...

andreasrocha · Posted: Mon Jul 12, 2004 3:57 pm

OK...I think I got it now. Comments are still welcome. And then I'll put it in the finished pieces section.

patrick · Posted: Mon Jul 12, 2004 4:25 pm

Her shoulders and arms are too stiff and the poor dear has no shoulder muscle, its all collarbone from the shoulder to the neck. it makes her look 2 dimensional. I might suggest cocking her shoulders to an angle. Since her hips seem to be at an angle its almost unnatural for her shoulders to be straight. Usually when one hip goes upward, the shoulder on that side dips toward it. Check some clothing catalogs with female models to see what I mean.
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