[Yanka]

Hello everybody here!
This is my first post here although I've been vistiting this forum for a while now...
Well, I started on this picture and I'm sorta stuck with her. OK, here it is (hope that works)

What bothers me most is the shape of the head (around the chin), the arm and this weird mouth... Anybody any sugetions plz? I'd really appreciate it...

[Link_omega]

First shrink the hands a little.
Close the mouth a little about half as mutch white then what is showing.
To make it clear that she is crying expose her left eye. Closed with a tear or a streamer of water running down her/ his cheek.
The hair doesnt have that natural bounce empasized by a woman.

[daeldren]

Well the first step which is a fundamental for the most part which is sketch the skeleton or a rough dummy sketch first in order to position the body and get the proportions more accurate.

[Al Ian]

I'm not sure if this was intended, but the proportions make her seem like a dwarf. Short arms and large hands do that. Also, for her facial features her head as a hole would be bigger. However the painiting and shading I like, especialy in the hair!!
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[Link_omega]

Come to think of it the ear reminds me of a goblins ear. skin texture looks correct keep the work up.

[Yanka]

Thx you all for the advice! I wasn't feeling too well today and pretty much slept all day *headaches* , so I couldn't work on it any more, but I'll try some things tomorrow...

@Link_omega: Yeah, I think you're right with the large hands... But do you think it would also do to just enlarge shoulder and arm, or are they also too large compared to the face...?

@Al Ian: Well, no no Dwarf actually... just turned out that way. But I maybe have to say that this is an Elf in terms of the Comics ElfQuest by Richard and Weny Pini (see www.elfquest.com), which are very short,with big heard and ears like that. Guess I overdid it a litttle

Maybe it should just start something new, since this is a somewhat hard pose to begin with... (Its just my second try at digital painting ) Do ya guys think it's worth keep working on it...?

[Ohlson]

First off, allow me to note how much the hair is appealing to me at this stage of the painting... i'm really likin' that... yup.

Okay... For the rest of the picture, I think you've created a few issues that are working against you at the moment, which may be causing you to have problems progressing at the moment, especially because you've been looking at them the whole time, and you have a notion in your head of how you see it.
If I imagine this head being upright, that ear is slightly off. It would seem that it'd be going directly backwards.... no? If not directly backwards.... it's pretty extreme... and I might also add that it's quite "meaty".. as well as just a tid bit large for this image, perhaps. It looks like it may be vearing off away from the head a little too much as well, instead of being "sleek" and following the lines of the face, that an elf ear would normally be imagined by most of us.
The hands that you've created are slightly large as well, as someone else has noted. At the moment, they are very masculine in my eyes... and whilst there are no direct features that would lead someone to believe that this is a female, save for the hair, I think many would be confused as to the specific gender.
*looking at image some more*
I could be wrong about her right hand being too large.... it's awfully border-line though. With an elf... .. female no less.... perhaps the "safer" way of approaching this would be to be in the mind set of "smaller is better". Smallness obviously related in people's subconscious a bit more towards "petit" than something that's large.
*looking again*
I think the pinky finger on the right hand has a feminine feel to it.... yet slightly too long.. and bent in a funny way.
The ring finger reminds me very much of a middle finger. So perhaps a lot of the issues I'm seeing with that hand, are attributed to that.

Pressing on...

The left hand would appear to be slightly too large and masculine as well.
This arm is being subtly fore-shortened, so it's a little tricky, and I think you've addressed that nicely. As with the other comments I've mention, you may have that slightly too large as well. Width... not length. The size of the forearm in comparison to the bicep might be causing this. As I said... this can be a tricky area.... so I could very well be off the mark. Personally... I would slim up the forearm along the top as well as the bottom... and bring it closer to wrist-width.

I agree with Link_omega in that perhaps a minor adjustment of the pose, might be in order.
As for the mouth... closing it half as much, would be good as well.
The lips have a turn for the worse, I'd say. They're very...... mmm........ (don't take this the wrong way)..... Mr. Potatohead-ish.
They feel like they're attached to the face, rather than being part of the face. The lips shouldn't have the heavy dark outline... a thin bit will do... and more subtle. (note that you put a very light value next to the dark value.... which makes the dark seem darker.. and the light seem lighter)... the skin surrounding a lip should lead up to the edge of the lip.... with a slight change in colour. So the skin should have a "raised" feeling as well. For the colour/shade of the lips... I'd be inclined to stick with using the fingernail as a "pallete" for it.

The jaw line is very squared off, as you've mentioned... and I think part of the problem is how you've created that portion of the face to buldge.

okay, I went and fiddled in PS for about 15 minutes...
so this is still not what you want....but the direction that I think it needs to go.



I zoomed in on the lips to illustrate what I was trying to say about the subtlety of it. I didn't really do anything with the bottom lip. One thing to note on mine... is that I didn't tend to the corner of the mouth at all.... but all you need to do is bring the values of the lip... more towards the skin... and terminate that highlight on the bottom lip before it gets to the meeting point with the upper lip while lightening up on the undershadow of that lip as well. It's still wide on the corner.
Am I making any sense with this?
mmm... heh... grab a mirror. =)
I addressed the chin real quick too. I'm now guessing that the "dip" in the side of the face was to help create the cheek bone being raised a bit. I just smoothed it out.... killed the lower highlight... and shaved off the beginning of the jaw, back near the ear.

Like I said... these are just quickies that I think mebbe you need to go in the direction of. That's up for debate though. I like it so far, and I don't think that you have any "major" issues going on here........ just needed a new set of eyes looking at it.

Lastly,
mmm.. hello everyone.. I'm a new. *shrug*
Been lurkin' for a bit. I've been known to do some painting "from time to time". I wasn't real sure if it was kinda "fopah" around here to paint on someone else's image to illustrate a point, like I did above. If so, I apologize.

Cheers all.


[I wrote this quite a few hours back... but my wonderful ISP has kept me offline.... so these comments come prior to Yanka's most recent post.]
And yes... I think you should keep working on it.

[Link_omega]

Wow I really feal abashed for not doing a better critique that Ohlson has achieved in his post...

I would like to add more but it seems that Ohlson has gotten to punchline first hmm there has to be something we've missed gotta take another look again....

Come to think of it is this picture representing a male or female
if female then it look better if shoulders were expanded a little and
bustline added
if male than same thing but bit more meat could be added to the muscle structure or at least some form of definition to shoulder structure...
Age consideration will impact this as well..
Hair looks fine and noticed that its a little too pale below the ears hard
hard to tell but it does appear that the body or head is slightly
mismatched... not to worry just need to focus on the hands and arms as mentioned by Ohlson
Excellent Critique Ohlson.
Thankyou for your time.

[Yanka]

Wow Ohlson, I'm impressed. Thanks a lot for your help...
I thought about that and figured that probably the best thing to do would be a quick sketch to get the basic shapes and proportions right (someone alrealdy pointed that out...), so I tried on that for now....

I'm still havin' problems to add the second hand... just doesen't look right, but I thought I'd post it anyway... *keepstrying*



Oops, just noticed I forgot to do the 'elf' ear I'll fix that too....

As for gender and age... it IS suposed to be a young female elf in Elfquest Style... Here's another picture of her:

[Link_omega]

Hmm. I've decided to give a crack and this is what I got currently.. She's a
little bald for now but it give a rough estimate to size of young childs
head...

Currently Availble
It now contains an update Still bald
Please bear with, I'm usually on an IBM most part of the day...
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Thankyou for your time.

Click here to critique me if you like!

[Link_omega]

Got a new version of my version of the crying elf... enjoy
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Thankyou for your time.

Click here to critique me if you like!