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eyewoo · Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2001 4:28 am

Welcome back Sijun.com

Been working on this for a while. I'm not real happy with it, but it's time to move on...

detail 1

detail 2

detail 3

reference photo

[ October 01, 2001: Message edited by: fleabrain ]

travis travis · Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2001 5:08 am

neat ref. nice painting style too.

at Stop & Shop nearby they painted a flag on front store window with 55 stars.

paltsi · Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2001 5:22 am

I think it would be better with dark background as in the reference pic. But anyway it's good. Your style.

Digital Genesis · Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2001 6:48 am

Very neat. I like the way it looks. Definitely don't change it to be darker

v1510nAry · Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2001 10:08 am

thats it some great work, specially the use of perspective !

Great.

Quasar · member Member # Joined: 01 Oct 2001 Posts: 355

Nice!!

Breakerboy2 · Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2001 2:30 pm

Hey fleab. This is really nice. You've juggled a lot of information and managed to keep things from getting too busy. My only real crit would be that the wall under the steps feels a little too lit. It's jumping too far forward IMO - throws the perspective off slightly. I think if it receded back just a little more (or if the steps cast a stronger shadow on it), the space would read more clearly.

The jet trail is a nice touch and the graffiti looks really "natural." Whatever that means.

Great textures overall.

Ian Jones · Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2001 8:43 pm

Hi, great painting you have here, nice style.

I agree with Cicinimo, its also got a story within it. Good point.

I also think that Breakerboy2 has a good point about the shadow under the stairs. Make it a little bit darker, but not too dark, because that would detract from the rest of the painting. So "a little" more shadow would add much needed depth there.

Your whole lighting sceme seems a little strange to me. It looks like the sky is pretty well clear, and you would then expect to see strong sunshine and strong cast shadows. In your case however you have rendered the lighting in a much more diffuse manner, and it tends to make the situation look overcast and a little gloomy.

You have a couple of options. You ould stay with the diffuse and overcast look, and if so I think you should add some more clouds in the sky so it makes sense.

or..

You could make the sun shine brighter, to match the sky, and introduce some brights and some strong cast shadows. It would then be great to see the filtration of light through the foliage of the trees which would cast a 'dappled' light effect on the ground.

more work though...

oh and just a quick question... are the stairs meant to have bent railings and bent metal bits? It just looks like you had trouble with straight lines there.

Hope that helps!

cybertoker2001 · Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2001 9:40 pm

Great work!
I love the detailing in the leaves. (You're always so good a painting leaves.)

I love the texures in this piece.......The steps looks awesome too.

No crits from me today.

Take it easy,
CT2001

Petra Pan · Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2001 11:27 pm

Good work

Cicinimo · Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2001 11:32 pm

I like it, I like it. Not just because its a good painting, but becaues it tells a story. I'm feeling the message (I think).

eyewoo · Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2001 10:39 am

Well... thought I was done with this one, but there have been several very helpful crits and suggestions in the forums, so I have made some changes. Brought the saturation down a bit, increased contrast on some of the stairway and darkened the wall underneath the stairway...

Thanks for the comments and suggestions...