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Lunatique · Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2001 8:51 am

I'll be finishing this today. I just wanted to throw this back on here for one last critique before I finish it off.

I do value everyone's opinion, but this time, I'm looking for some sort of breakthrough, so I especially want the more advanced artists to give me their 2 cents.

Thanks.

BTW, the only parts that are finished at this point are the background. The rest is not even rendered correctly yet. Some are just roughed in for the general shapes and contrast(such as the cloak).

[ December 08, 2001: Message edited by: Lunatique ]

GatoNegro13 · Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2001 9:03 am

OMG! That is gorgeous! I've never seen somthing like this by you. I cant critique it! Can you critique mine? Its pretty much my first post...its in FW.

Gothic Gerbil · Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2001 9:40 am

Sorry I don't qualify as one of the more advanced artists but I'll give you my critique. Her head looks nice though the lighting on the face is rather strange. Her lips don't seem quite right, like they're drawn from a different perspective than her nose and eyes. I think it is because of the way you did the right hand (hers) edge of the lips. Her chest looks rather messed up unfortunately, like you couldn't decide what bust size you wanted to give her. And she also looks like she has no arms. I really like the way you rendered the clouds up top, those look really really nice, though perhaps a bit out of perspective, judging from how the horizon looks. I think you should also pull some of the mist over her lower torso to tie her into the background some more, but that might also flatten out your image more than you'd like so I don't know. Hmm ... no shadows on her face from the hair, but then again it is really difficult to tell where the lighting is coming from as mentioned earlier. I must say though that your texturing on the cloak is pretty awesome. Good luck, have fun finishing it!

Manik Monkei · Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2001 3:36 pm

I really like where this piece is going. I'd have to say I disagree w/ Gerbil about the lips. I think they look fine. The face looks beautiful in my opinion.

Things I'd suggest would be bringing the shadow from her hood farther down her face.. maybe even covering her eyes a little bit. I'm not even sure if it would look good, but I'd at least give it a shot

The mountains look too detailed and too sketchy in comparison with the smoothness of her face. The left mountain is a distraction and pulls my eye away from the rest of it.

Her cloak looks rough, but you already said that

The rim lighting on her face doesn't look too bad but it makes me wonder where it's coming from and why none of it is touching her cloak or hair.

I'll shut up now

this piece feels great and it'll be great to see it finished.

jr · Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2001 3:57 pm

a highlight that would make that strong of an impression on her face, should also appear on her clothes, also , it would be nice to see a less cut out look on the figure, i don't mean to totally blurr the outline on her, but she's soooo sharp right now.
btw, the texture on her hood is amazing!
(hmmm, i guess it's self serving to reply to this thread....

)

Bg · Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2001 3:06 am

Here's the best I could come up with. I changed the mountains and weather and put some perspective to the clouds:

Lunatique · Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2001 5:02 am

Damn that's nice! I visualized this piece as a snow scene since the very begining, but I never thought of rain. Very effective!

Thanks for all the comments. They are definitely helpful. I was going to finish it up today, but something came up. Also, I'm dying to color Steven's drawing.

I'll be wrapping it up probably tonight or tomorrow.

BTW, sorry about the "advanced artist" comment. That was to filter out all the 13 yr olds that says things like, "Dude, that's so gay." or "She's kinda ugly."

Gothic Gerbil · Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2001 9:11 am

So does that mean I can't say she's kinda cute I'd hit on her?

I liked the atmosphere of the rain piece but I think her face is more suited to the snow one.

Steven Stahlberg · Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2001 10:04 am

Beautiful image! But I did an overpaint, hope I'm not out of line, or too late to help you.
I resolved the fold in the armpit more, and the mountains, and pushed the clouds around a little, and some other stuff... I guess you can see for yourself better than what I can describe it in words.

Lunatique · Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2001 11:14 am

Hey, very cool. I like that fold!

The folds I have now is just a bunch of stupid lines. I havn't even started on the folds yet!

Must...get..it...done...today....

Lihamyrsky · member Member # Joined: 06 Dec 2001 Posts: 66

a bit more contrast maybe?

i actually gaped when i first saw the image, so good work =)

Lunatique · Posted: Thu Dec 13, 2001 2:30 am

Finished, and I want to cry. I failed.

It's way too stiff.

The original sketch had so much more life.

and I hate the way it's rendered.

This is what happens when you don't paint for a year and then jump back into it.

dkimblad · Posted: Thu Dec 13, 2001 9:53 am

Just a little comment. The shape of clouds can only be seen from afar. Avoid detail in fog that's close. Otherwise it'll look like cotton

http://dreamwater.net/eod

JuRrAsStOiL · junior member Member # Joined: 03 Dec 2001 Posts: 13

I really like it. the face and the atmosphere, everything is just perfect.
but i just don't like the snow. it looks too much like dots from a standard photoshop brush. I've never done some digital art, so I don't know how hard it is to make snow

BTW: which software did u use for rendering? Maya, softimage or something diffrent?

[ December 13, 2001: Message edited by: JuRrAsStOiL ]

Lunatique · Posted: Thu Dec 13, 2001 8:01 pm

errr. It was painted in photoshop by hand. I don't even know how to model something like this in 3D.

Cotton clouds... Woo Hoo! I suck.

lookitsfrank · Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2001 2:39 pm

ok. I did a paintover. my main problems were the lighting on the cloak and the colors of the face (which is rendered beautifully, btw.) the face seemed like it was being hit by a warm lightsource rather than a cool one (the snow underneath.) anyway, you can probably see more by the paintover.

tdl · Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2001 3:16 pm

It's a great piece. Only two comments: I didn't quite understand her lips until I saw the close-up, maybe tone down the top part of the lips so it doesn't get completely lost.

Second comment, soften up the edge of her cloak, it seems almost like she's cut out and placed on top of that background.

P.D: Timo, you are the man

Lunatique · Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2001 5:34 pm

Hey, thanks. I don't know if I'm going to dig up the piece to fix it, or just move on to the next piece. If I do fix it, I'll repost again.

Thanks again for all the crits. Very helpful.

Maxmike · Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2001 8:01 pm

aww man, I had a long reply to this too... for some reason I can't see it... anyhow, It basically said that i liked the darker cloak better, all you have to do is fix up the folds and texture it.