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Enayla member
Member # Joined: 26 Nov 2000 Posts: 1217 Location: Sweden
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Posted: Wed May 09, 2001 3:06 am |
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Subject: Spelling Changes Coming Soon
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New Spelling changes you need to be aware of -
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish."
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k:" This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replased with the "f." This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mess of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful and they should go away.
By the 4th year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th"with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of
kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer.
ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!!!! And zen ve vil take over ze vorld!!
(Edit) I'm a clutz.
[ May 09, 2001: Message edited by: Enayla ] |
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Lunatique member
Member # Joined: 27 Jan 2001 Posts: 3303 Location: Lincoln, California
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Posted: Wed May 09, 2001 6:44 am |
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Bwahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!
Oh man, that was good.
Ve Vil, Ve vil, rok U!! |
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Jezebel member
Member # Joined: 02 Nov 2000 Posts: 1940 Location: Mesquite, TX, US
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Posted: Wed May 09, 2001 9:52 am |
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hahaha... that's hilarious ![](images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif) |
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v1510nAry member
Member # Joined: 31 Dec 2000 Posts: 611 Location: London , England
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Posted: Wed May 09, 2001 10:15 am |
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o dat great, hehe ![](images/smiles/icon_rolleyes.gif) |
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Bishop_Six member
Member # Joined: 13 Dec 2000 Posts: 646 Location: Arizona, US
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Posted: Wed May 09, 2001 10:23 am |
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *choke*..hAHa *cough* *wheeze* *gag* /drops dead |
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SlightlyTwisted member
Member # Joined: 11 Dec 2000 Posts: 436 Location: Oslo, Norway
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Posted: Wed May 09, 2001 1:26 pm |
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*BOL*
Konzider ziz pozt uterli uzles. ![](images/smiles/icon_razz.gif) |
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PlantMan member
Member # Joined: 22 Feb 2001 Posts: 176 Location: Brighton, England
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Posted: Fri May 11, 2001 5:40 pm |
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(edit drunken nonsense)
I cant believe I actually believed you
Ve have vays of makink you talk!
(apologies for mild xenophobic overtones)
[ May 12, 2001: Message edited by: PlantMan ] |
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Dives member
Member # Joined: 22 Sep 2000 Posts: 392 Location: Finland
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Posted: Fri May 11, 2001 11:19 pm |
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you are one crazy girl where do you come up with this stuff... Oh have i mentioned i like your stuff lately? |
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Count Zero member
Member # Joined: 12 Nov 1999 Posts: 586 Location: Helsinki, Finland
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Posted: Sat May 12, 2001 12:22 am |
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Umm... old joke anyone?
Heard that one, like, 2 years ago. T'was the "all your base are belong to us" of a few weeks.
Amusing nonetheless. |
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Enayla member
Member # Joined: 26 Nov 2000 Posts: 1217 Location: Sweden
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Posted: Sat May 12, 2001 2:02 am |
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Heheh, I did so not come up with this.
Count Zero: *rolls eyes* So if you had already read it, why did you bother to reply? I hadn't read it, see. Thought I'd share with some people and see if they liked it too. |
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Count Zero member
Member # Joined: 12 Nov 1999 Posts: 586 Location: Helsinki, Finland
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Posted: Sat May 12, 2001 3:20 am |
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I was just surprised by the amount of people here who hadn't read it yet...
No offense meant. |
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