[Visigothan]

I recently began drawing again, in an effort to get back in the habit.

Need a few opionions on this piece - No photo reference used. Done with paths, over a freehand sketch of mine. Notice that in screenshot #11, the perspective problem with the face is fixed.

http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot1.jpg
http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot2.jpg
http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot3.jpg
http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot4.jpg
http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot5.jpg
http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot6.jpg
http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot7.jpg
http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot8.jpg
http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot9.jpg
http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot10.jpg
http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot11.jpg

No photo reference used - Total working time from planning/sketching/paths has been about 4 hours.

Sub-note: Shoes and 3 different hairstyles will be added later, in addition to a cigarette in [her] right hand.
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Your car is a fiberglass penis extension.

[Visigothan]

Wow.

139 views, and no replies? Does it suck THAT bad?
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Your car is a fiberglass penis extension.

[Heysoos]

heh, maybe people are just daunted by all the links. I think maybe the hair should be handled a bit more graphicly like you did in 7. The hand looks a bit stiff and awkwardly posed. Nice line work.
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http://www.angelfire.com/art2/wfkeil

[Wojtala]

I managed to see throught all the links And I have to say the lines have very nice shapes... But if its going to be realistic I think the face should be more sexy (delicate) and hands needs some work like Heysoos said. I think when You give some color tones on the skin it will look do good -because now the contrast between the detail of the hair and skin is too strong.

Hope I helped ... good luck
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Maciej Wojtala | wojtala.com

[xzacto]

hmmm. This image could really go anywhere. you are obviously not going for realism with the lines there. those lines (Pen tool with simulated brush pressure) is used more in the graphic design/Logo development area but could really work to your advantage as it provides a very smooth elegant feel to your image.

the only thing that I can see that can be critiqued as far as changes:

the hair looks like it's sitting a bit too low on the top of her head (if it where to be a wig). also it looks a bit stiff which kinda makes me feel uptight about the feel of your image as it stands.

the nose could be just a shade smaller

the underside of the chin isn't quite right. it gives her almost a "manly" feel with a more prominent jaw line. smooth out the transition between the chin and the neck. unless her head is turned slight ly away from the POV, then the mouth needs some perspective work

it's really not as bad as I am making it sound, there are just a few slight adjustments that I would personaly make.

keep posting
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[Visigothan]

Thanks for the replies - Updated!

http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot12.jpg
http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot13.jpg
http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot14.jpg

You are correct that I am not going for a totally photo-real look. I may, however, by adjusting the opacity of the outline later and simply shading it all in.

This is the original sketch that started this - done without the pen tool, by hand:

http://www.ramenbudget.com/fullsizeart/pinup1v7.jpg

Change the "7" in the URL to the numbers 1, 2, 3, etc, all the way up through 8 to see what sketches I went through before deciding on this pose.
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Your car is a fiberglass penis extension.

[Visigothan]

Thoughts? Any criticisms are appreciated.
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Your car is a fiberglass penis extension.

[faeklone]

looks good so far. I"m sure that you're going to be pushing some values more next. Also look at the hair as a single object rather than a collection of objects. This will help you in the early stages to make it looks right and add details.
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"It's not the tools you use but how you use them that counts."

[DeadbeaT]

yea, push those values up in the skies i'd say. also the hair sort of bothers me, the texture makes it look really coarse if you know what i mean, like on a toothbrush or something, maybe if you make them float more and make the lengths a lite more "random"?

I also see some anatomical irregularities, but im totaly in love with that line on her nose for some strange reason, ive studied it 4 times now... im such a fool...
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DeadbeaT was here

[Visigothan]

Could you point out some of the anatomical irregularities? I'd appreciate it, thanks.

Ones I've already fixed:

Humerus lengths - fixed
Feet - fixed
Hands - already fixed finger lengths - adding more detail soon
Nose/Chin - Fixed, made less pronounced
Lips - Less of a collagen look

Any suggestions would be appreciated - My figure-drawing-fu is rusty as hell. :p
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Your car is a fiberglass penis extension.

[faeklone]

Okay, anatomicial crit like you wanted, using the picture pinup1v7.

Starting with the arm that is closest to us, the shoulder is dislocated. It's hanging too far down to be her actual shoulder. The shoulder begins at the end of the collarbone, as teh collarbone is one of 3 bones that compose that joint. The other two being the arm bone(humerus?) and the shoulder blade (Scalpula). The shoulder should be a ball at the junction of all three bones, not hanging limpliy like it is at the moment. So bring the arm up. Second thing is that the arm looks a little thick for the body, espescially considering the look of the piece which I assume is more trying to look like the 30's pinups. Make a definate 90 degree angle at her elbow. Don't pussyfoot around where it should be, it's there and that's how it will look right. The last bit about that arm is the position of the hand. it's kind of unnatural to have your hand facing your ass in a reclining position. Try it for yourself. IMHO the way it should be done is with the fingers on the front, and the thumb in the back. That way it's a much more naturalistic pose.

The above comment about eh thikness of the arm and the elbow goes for the other side too. it would just about be fixed if you went and drew a straight line from the wrist to the elbow, and made the line tracking the tricept srtraighter.

The chest is really a problematic area at the moment. What's making it problematic is the lack of a ribcage ont eh left side of the picture. That whole part of the picture needs to be pulled out some more to make it look more like there's ribs underneath the flesh. the line of the breast on the left side is also a little off. Make it closer to verticle to make to look a little better, and that little tick at the top of that curve should be defining where the breast turns into the shoulder. So it's just about in the right place, just move it over a bit. Looking at the lower part of the breast right now, I think you should leave the breat alone except for my last comment, and make the ribs start closer to the junction you have between the arm and the breast. Make it a little tick of ribs, then allow it to curve into the rest of the stomach and it will look right.

The hips are another area that makes you look twice at the picture, and make you feel a little odd about it. First of all, she has no buttocks. There's the indication of a hip, but the butt isn't drawn in. In a pose like you have her in the far side of the figure is mostly straight where the closer side whould be more curvy. It's just the way the figure is positioned. Second of all if you draw a ball for the hips, her crotch makes it look like her hips are more towards us than in line with the rest of her body. Move her crotch over more to the left and alllow that thigh to get bigger, and the other to get smaller. The other one is mostly hidden anyway wo we shouldn't see alot of it.

Okay, I jsut looked at the lower body positioning, and I think you need to rework it a bit. The way you have it positioned, most of the weight of the body would be on the hind leg, so that would make the left side a little more curvy, and the right a little straighter. bend her knee a little on the closer leg, and thin out the calf muscle a bit.

Looking at the top and the bottom together, I think the top is fine, so I would suggest thinking aobut reworking the bottom. If you have a full length mirror, or are an astute enough observer to not need one, try the pose with your own body and see what it does, and what feels unnatural. then do a few figure sketches of that pose in relation to this drawing. For those I usually use balls for the joints and lines to connect them. The idea here is to figure out movement, and how the placemtn of limbs in certain positions will affect the look and the placement of weight, causeing other limbs to move in ways you didn't think of before.

Lastly, the breast closest to us should be drawn at the middle of the chest, about level with the mipple, to the shoulder that will make it look a little more realistic.

With figure drawing it's all a matter of looking and practice and observation. Practice is a given. Observation is how the figure reacts and moves and bends. Looking is seeing how certain areas are rendered and how light affects them, etc. getting good at all these thing will help you improve your artwork dramaticially.

Keep it up!
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"It's not the tools you use but how you use them that counts."

[Visigothan]

Don't use pinup1v7.jpg as a reference - it's terribly old.

Use this:

http://www.ramenbudget.com/miscgraphics/pinup_screenshot16.jpg

Half the stuff you've mentioned has already been fixed.

Thanks for the notes! It's much appreciated.

EDIT:

I see what you mean, re: the legs/hips area. Thanks for the tip.
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Your car is a fiberglass penis extension.