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Topic : "Color Action sequence" |
Snoozer
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 Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 9:33 pm |
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Here are a few of the latest pages for our next scene. I think some of the effects turned out well.
CB
http://www.alpha-shade.com
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neff
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| Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 5:15 am |
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i like the drawings and style... but the story is so... boring.
only an endless sequence of actionscenes :-&
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Mon
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| Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 5:33 am |
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I think it's great. Some pages don't hold up as well as others, but over all it's wonderful, both story and art. It got me reading it.
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Max
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| Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 11:18 am |
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wow...I like it too. totally agree with Mon.
The story is great...imo. nicely done |
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shin
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| Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 1:01 pm |
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like 2nd page...  |
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Mega Muffin
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| Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 4:31 pm |
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| Yeah, the pics are awsome, but I dont quite get the story. It does just seem to be a neverending action sequence, and to tell you the truth I don't know what is going on. And at times its hard to tell who is saying what. Again, really great artwork. |
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Snoozer
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Spectra
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| Posted: Thu Jun 17, 2004 7:15 am |
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I like the artworks, and about the story, it's "ok". Mon used the right words: "It got me reading it."
Nice work.
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Snoozer
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just a guy
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Joined: 23 Jun 2004
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| Posted: Fri Jun 25, 2004 6:44 pm |
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Hey this is good work, man. In sequential art I understand that the work being "readable" is pretty key as far as the art goes. This stuff reads great. The colors are good enough to pull the story off, though the artwork doesn't really have a style of it's own. Kudos. Keep posting!
You post these on penciljack yet? |
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Max
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| Posted: Fri Jun 25, 2004 11:30 pm |
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| As I said before...that' really cool man. Keep it up!!! |
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The Real Mark
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| Posted: Sat Jun 26, 2004 1:49 am |
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They look like children? on a battlefield?
Nice art though. I'd probably up the contrast alot, with darker darks and lighter lights... just me though. |
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Snoozer
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| Posted: Wed Jun 30, 2004 4:51 pm |
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| Quote: |
| They look like children? on a battlefield? |
Here's a tank crew from the 1st Royal Tank Regiment taken during World War Two. See the age encrusted faces? The look that says "I've been there, I've seen it all, and I've conquered it!"
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Snoozer
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| Posted: Wed Jun 30, 2004 8:11 pm |
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Half way threw this page we came up with the idea of having the Flyer try and protect it's rider from the fall. All the flyer drawing were finished, so Joe had to go back in and redraw elements to make the page work. I dust effects in the fall turned out nicely I think as did the light background in panel 3.
CB
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Lunatique
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| Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2004 8:29 pm |
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| Your sequential storytelling is quite good, but your anatomy/figure drawing is the glaring weakness. I think you should spend some time drilling yourself on it--even quick and dirty short lessons a few times a week can do wonders. Anything from looking at yourself in the mirror, looking at people around you, sketching from life, photos..etc. Many of yor poses do not depict the limitations for the human joints--your characters often bend their joints way too far--and they'd break their necks and limbs in real life in those poses. There's also proportion issues, perspective issues (in terms of foreshortening and the figures). Your clothing folds are shaky too, but better than your figure drawing. Also, you need to lock down on your knowledge of the planes of the human head/parts. You have different planes at weird angles--and they are not coherent while existing in the same space. for example, the planes of the jawline sits at he wrong angle from the planes of the cheeks. The necks are also broken on most of your figures--study the structure of the neck bones/muscles and how it attaches to the shoulders--and most importantly, know how far the head can turn before the neck breaks--this is a common mistake that many people make. |
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Snoozer
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| Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2004 2:30 am |
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[quote="Lunatique"] but your anatomy/figure drawing is the glaring weakness.quote]
We've been working on it. I know it's not prefect, but it's passible... We try to improve on the figure work page by page. If you look at the stuff we did 18 months ago,
http://www.alpha-shade.com/www/pages/pagesoldc.htm
you can see we've come along way. We've a long way to go yet though...
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Snoozer
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| Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2004 2:55 am |
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The bottom frame of the newest page is all photoshop because the flash background didn't blend in well with the explosion.
CB
http://www.alpha-shade.com
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Teemu Er�maa
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| Posted: Fri Jul 09, 2004 4:58 am |
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I like the style like the others but you really should (if not with this project, but with the next) consider concentrating on the typography. Try reading other graphically stunning pieces and look how they do it - the conversation bubbles etc.. Especially the "Yelling/ambient voices-bubbles" aren't working. The line used on the bubbles don't have to follow your drawing technique on ppl... The text is somewhere too large and the font is not good for a comic this style. Actually the font is not good for anything these days. Reminds me a bit of ms comic sans.
Also the KABOOM and WHOOP - textual elements need a bit tuning, but not too much, you are on the right track.
Great that you can keep on going and don't give up :_)
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TGC
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| Posted: Sun Jul 11, 2004 12:02 am |
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| I can appreciate the amount of work that must have gone into those pages... they look great! I like the readability (they flow very well) and I think you've got some good talent. The cool part is that if you continue with it, your style will solidify and evolve. Great work. |
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Snoozer
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Location: Minneapolis
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| Posted: Fri Jul 16, 2004 11:51 pm |
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The top frame took a few extra days to finish, but I think it was worth the extra time.
CB
http://www.alpha-shade.com
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Snoozer
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| Posted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 5:18 pm |
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CwStone
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| Posted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 9:25 am |
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o snap
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divtag
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| Posted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 12:55 pm |
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 i really enjoyed reading this... good story and good artwork!
i think the anatomy works like hell (yeah, in a good way that is)...
cant complain aboot nothing... keep posting!! |
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Snoozer
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Location: Minneapolis
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| Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2004 10:47 pm |
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| divtag wrote: |
i really enjoyed reading this... good story and good artwork!
i think the anatomy works like hell (yeah, in a good way that is)...
cant complain aboot nothing... keep posting!! |
Thx Divtag 
CB
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Greensun
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Location: Almere, Netherlands
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| Posted: Tue Aug 03, 2004 12:32 pm |
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was it intended that the main characters look like little children? sorry, I joined a couple of minutes ago, I am completely lost where this is going.
they look like little kids.. if this was intended, than good job.. if not....
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Snoozer
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| Posted: Tue Aug 10, 2004 12:44 am |
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I think the grass fire and explosions worked out pretty well. The burms finally turned out the way I wanted.
CB
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bearsclover
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| Posted: Tue Aug 10, 2004 1:27 pm |
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| Lunatique wrote: |
| Your sequential storytelling is quite good, but your anatomy/figure drawing is the glaring weakness. I think you should spend some time drilling yourself on it--even quick and dirty short lessons a few times a week can do wonders. Anything from looking at yourself in the mirror, looking at people around you, sketching from life, photos..etc. Many of yor poses do not depict the limitations for the human joints--your characters often bend their joints way too far--and they'd break their necks and limbs in real life in those poses. |
I think you are overstating this a little bit. Sure, the anatomy, proportions and overall drawing could be better�we all could be better. But nothing stands out that "glaringly" to me. I was not looking at the work with a super-critical eye, to be sure, but I got an overall good impression from all this work. Some of the exaggerations and distiortions did not bother me�this style of work often defies the rules of anatomy and I've becomed used to that.
But of course, emphasis on figure drawing is always a good idea.
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Lunatique
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| Posted: Tue Aug 10, 2004 5:46 pm |
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| bearsclover wrote: |
I think you are overstating this a little bit. Sure, the anatomy, proportions and overall drawing could be better�we all could be better. But nothing stands out that "glaringly" to me. I was not looking at the work with a super-critical eye, to be sure, but I got an overall good impression from all this work. Some of the exaggerations and distiortions did not bother me�this style of work often defies the rules of anatomy and I've becomed used to that.
But of course, emphasis on figure drawing is always a good idea. |
Well, I suppose it all depends how you want your comic book to look next to all the competitions in the industry then. Great comic books have excellent art and writing, and I think all comic book creators strive for that--or they should. Human characters are typically the focus of stories--if they have obvious mistakes in their depiction, then they will affect the quality of the overall endeavor negatively. I'm picky though because I was a comic book creator for 8 years, and I spent countless nights slaving over my anatomy/figures/perspective..etc. It's no walk in the park, and when someone does it well and gets it right, it really shows--and when they don't, it's even more obvious. |
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bearsclover
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| Posted: Tue Aug 10, 2004 6:48 pm |
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| Lunatique wrote: |
Well, I suppose it all depends how you want your comic book to look next to all the competitions in the industry then. Great comic books have excellent art and writing, and I think all comic book creators strive for that--or they should. |
True enough, and true enough for Snoozer.
| Quote: |
| Human characters are typically the focus of stories--if they have obvious mistakes in their depiction, then they will affect the quality of the overall endeavor negatively. |
True enough again.
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| I'm picky though because I was a comic book creator for 8 years, and I spent countless nights slaving over my anatomy/figures/perspective..etc. |
I'm not into comics (at all) so my voice in this probably shouldn't carry as much weight. I don't know what the market demands. However, I am not without my own pickiness, especially when it comes to faces. (Not that my own work is flawless, obviously.) But it's something I notice. But I also can recognize some variations, some exaggerations, etc., can be pleasing and even acceptable to some, even if they would not be acceptable to me. Just because I'm anal-retentive, doesn't mean everyone else has to be! 
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| It's no walk in the park, and when someone does it well and gets it right, it really shows--and when they don't, it's even more obvious. |
Once again, can't speak for the comics market, because it isn't my area. But I've seen some really . . . not terribly good artwork that seems to pass muster in many areas, and nobody seems to notice but me. (Like I said, I can be anal when I want to be. ) So while I can't speak for comics, I think that in a lot of areas, people don't notice. They don't have a clue.
With all that said, I think that Snoozer should strive for further excellence, as we all should, and he (she?) seems to be aware of that. But as far as I'm concerned, the flaws in the work do not jump out and scream at me. Some of it I just chalked up to a stylistic difference. YMMV and all that.
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Snoozer
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| Posted: Tue Aug 17, 2004 6:31 am |
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I think the shielding effects turned out pretty well on this page, although much of the detail is lost in the HTML version.
CB
http://www.alpha-shade.com
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