[Citizen Kane]

Here's a comic WIP that I'm working on at the moment, and it's sketchy of course. I will continue to tighten it up, but if anyone has anything to say, please do. I want it to have a deserty, cold look, and the colors to be kind of dull. Here is the 1st page without words that I'm working on at the moment.


http://www.p0stwh0rehosting.com/uploads/Citizen%20Kane/Wholecomic.jpg

[AndyT]

Try a different image host.
Registering and uploading is easy there, hotlinking the images should work:
http://www.p0stwh0rehosting.com/upcenter/register.php

The images are too smudgy/messy for my taste.
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http://www.conceptworld.org

[Citizen Kane]

OK, I'll do that, and I'll clean up the stuff a whole bunch, so there won't be a smudgie look to them.

[Citizen Kane]

OK, here's an updated version, and I tightened up some stuff, and added my dialogue, but can someone point me in the right direction of getting the last panel to not look so dorky?! As far as the rest, it's almost done. It's my first comic thing that I've done before. Thanks in advance to all who comment!!

http://www.p0stwh0rehosting.com/uploads/Citizen%20Kane/Wholecomic2.jpg
The bottom got cut off, but it looks almost the same as before, and I'm too lazy and have dialup to change it.

[Light]

This is OK. Some areas dont read.. too dark.

The last panel.. well that is tough. The thing is it looks like you are trying to cover up some of your mistakes by making the image darker.. That doesnt work. And its best to go back to sketches.

Now.. the last picture is a bit hard because you arent using any perspective cues. Study perspective. I think it would make that last panel a lot easier.

DONT do a sillute without drawing the entire figure in or else it will show up..

one other thing for something to be considered tone then it must be uniform...

you'd do better to work on sketching, and then lay down flat colors, and keep it more simple. adding more just makes it harder to fix. imo

CITIZEN KANE WROTE

"
OMG, this is the worst idiot I've ever come across in the entire entireness of ANY forum. OMFG, the peeps at eatpoo would tear your ass off and feed it to you apedog style Light!! Oh, and NEVER try to give others advice if you're not willing to give us respect and yourself respect. Don't bother giving me advice on perspective like you did recently if you don't show us you know anything about it. I suggest go to a n00b forum, you can find one by typing 'art forum' in google or something."

This is my last post here. Fuck this place. My critique is very nice for this piece, and my eye as an artist is definetly on a master level.

So fuck this place... BYE

PS: CITIZEN: MY ART IS BETTER THEN YOURS. GET IT THROUGH YOUR HEAD. YOUD BEST VISIT A NOOB FORUM.

Fucking moron.. BTW my critiques are also on a master level, and I wont be giving any more out.. Too many nobodies here. I can't take it no more.

[Light]

Maybe someone else can give Citizen some better advice then I have.

Citizen.. you are a real clown, and it proves the point that the people who can't draw are the first ones to jump on the bandwagon.

You can flame me all you want people but you aren't going ot be any better artist over it. This place is hurting my creativity.. I've never met so many idiots.

Dhabhi should close the forums. The administrators here are shit, and he is never here. No just let it keep going.. theres nothing here anyway but flamerss any more. This used to be a half-way decent forum.. now everything is newb stuff, and I get flamed. Man, that is too funny..

Anywa,y I draw for fun, and to make art. I don't draw to try to prove myself or let a few artist who can't draw or a few photocopiers flame me. Anyway, this place is making art not fun, and thats why I'm not supporting it any more.



I'm out.

[Citizen Kane]

quote="Light"]This is my last post here. Fuck this place. My critique is very nice for this piece, and my eye as an artist is definetly on a master level.[/quote]
THEN GO TO THE POO! [Sarcasm]I'M SURE THAT THEY'LL WELCOME YOU THERE! IN FACT THEY'LL PROBABLY AGREE WITH YOUR 'VIEWS'[Sarcasm]

[Citizen Kane]

I thought you already had your last post?! Please don't clutter up my thread anymore.

[kimchi]

[Citizen Kane]

OK, if anyone needs to continue to address Light, please do so in his thread, and please don't clutter up anyone elses. Thank you.

[Godwin]

really? that's really kind of you


this guy can go fuck himself, really. we need to save all his posts in a database, ask sumaleth to do that, then we'll spread it all over the community, and he can go to hell
all the crap about 'joining the elite', i mean... WHAT THE FUCK, this completely disgusts me, and man, if i ever met you in real life, you better fucking run for your life dude
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Derelict Studios|Godwin's Space

[bearsclover]

Now now Godwin, don't let that pesky testosterone make you get all riled up and get you to make threats against Light. That's not cool.

What he has done to himself here, and how he has presented himself here, is sad. That's the crux of it. Sad sad sad. He's annoying as hell and has got my dander up as well, but this whole thing is sad.

Now, back to the WIP comic. The graphics links aren't working right now, but I remember what I wanted to tell you before, when I saw them: The colors are bothering me. I know that you want them to be low-key and nigh onto monochomatic, but something needs to be zipped up with the colors. I think maybe...make it less contrasty, or more contrasty. I'm thinking on what is bugging me...hmmm. Maybe use less straight black in the shadows. Perhaps a reddish brown would be better? I'm not sure...

But, nice start on the WIP. Keep us posted!
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Madness takes its toll - please have exact change.