[neff]

Only a rough Sketch, could someone tell me the anatomyprobs?
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[robust]

Would just like to say , good piece.
There's to things that came to my attention when I glanced on your picture, HER FACE IS SCARY please try to change it , i think it doesnt hold the same quality as the other parts of the picture, and the legs seem to be to long and wide .. or is it just me ?

Well well , would love to see the picture finished keep it up.
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[neff]

Ehrm, i'll fix the face, the newer version now with _more_ stuff


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[AndyT]

WOW great

I didn't expect such an improvement.

Maybe it would help to move the head of the woman in the background down and to the left?
Don't know.

Can't wait to see the next version.
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[neff]

Yes, the head, i'll try to fix the problem, hav allready begun to colorize it...
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[AndyT]

I almost didn't have to wait. Hehe.

OMG the sky looks GREAT!!!
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[Simoom]

adding the coloring was certainly a big upgrade. the chicks face still seems a bit wide. the chick in the backgrounds head seems to be turned a bit too much as well, sorta like what andy was saying. it looks a bit dislocated. good job with the coloring so far though, keep going.

[neff]

k, have begun teh first bike
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[oDD]

yeah youre making big improvements dude . Change the face as andy told you. i like the colors. In the future - if i can suggest something - try to study diferences in the face that seperate male from female.
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[Mr. Heiesuke Oda]

dude this is awesome the colors have dramatically altered the look of the peice..keep goin!!!
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[neff]

Thanks!

Hope i'll finishing it sometime, phh


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[AndyT]

I like how you did the hair and the clothing / boots.
But I'm not so sure about the skin. It seems as if it's made up of highlights and shadows only. I'd paint over the skin areas with a midtone color and a low opacity brush. (My English sucks ... but I don't know how to say it in German either)

[neff]

thank you for comments, i tried to get a dirty sunbrowned(?)
look on thet skin, but i'll paint some middletones over it like you said
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[eyalyab]

fix the arms/wrist/palm/fingers. the arms look too short. her right one anyways. the arm doesnt become thinner near the wrist on her left arm. plus it seems like she has no wrist there (even though you tried to hide it behind the part she's holding. fingers need work. usually when you hold something the way she is the fingertips get closer to eachother rather than apart from eachother.
there is a disturbing bright light on her right thigh near the place the 'sun dont shine'. it should be dark, or if you want the light there, then add it on the boot directly underneath it too all the way down.

i usually like it more when you erase the outlines after you color it, but this came out neat. on the other hand, you can make the outlines thinner where there is light right near them and thicker where there is shade.

great job overall

[Kingofcups]

Overall realy nice. The character design and detail is good.

- depth fade the background and the characters will stand out a lot more.
- the main character: her jaw looks a bit weak. Left leg looks to be at slightly the wrong angle. Hands - should we see the tops of her thumbs poking out?
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[neff]

Thank you Eye, but i think its too late for such fixes , but i'll do it better next time
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[Lightbringer]

Overall I like the composition and I know it is a bit too late to change major parts of the anatomy, but her hips are almost non existent and her crotch appears to be located more in what should be the abdomen area. Additionally the line defining the left side of her torso is headed at a slight outward angle to the left and is then covered by the shirt, but the rest of her torso is leaning back and to the right. This give the lower portion of her torso beneath her breasts a thick/distended appearance. Moving the black line beneath her torn shirt on the left side slightly inward (towards the right) will help her proportions and stance look better.

No crits on the figure to the right side.

I love the "magic hour" color scheme you've chosen for the painting. I also like the shading technique you appear to be going with. It gives everything an oily, slick, boy is it hot out here kinda feel and accentuates the hi-tech/low-tech theme.

Overall it is shaping up to be a nice dystopian future pic. I'm looking forward to seeing it finished.

[neff]

Wow, ehrm, my english isnt that good, perhaps you could simply do an overpaint to show me the lines you would change? That would be great!
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[Lightbringer]

Ok I'll give it a shot. Basically there are two very subtle small things that distract me.

In the circled area the line of the left side of her belly angles to the left like the red line I added does. This is the same direction as the line off her rear end. This makes her torso look odd.

Then her crotch (to me) seems a bit high, but that might just be an optical illusion with the low riding belt. Still I drew a line where it looks to me that her crotch should be dropped down a bit.



Here's a paintover changing the two things i mentioned:



You can see sky between her shirt and her belly there and I think that combined with lowering the joining of her legs makes the hip area less distracting.

I apologize if it seems like two very small things, but that's where my eyes kept getting stuck in the painting.

I hope I didn't insult you with these minor changes. I really do like where the painting is going and look forward to seeing it in the finished gallery.

[neff]

Thank you! Did a little update finally )


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