| View previous topic :: View next topic |
| Author |
Topic : "Depression" |
Beowulfthefallen
member
Member #
Joined: 06 Jan 2002
Posts: 147
|
 Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2002 9:45 pm |
 |
 |
I've been going through a depressing time, and have been writing some poetry. I hope that you can all have an open mind and accept someone's thoughts to be as much works of art as anything else on the board. Critiques welcome!
Written today:
Here I stand, alone again,
at the doorstep of a new breed of sin.
I hold the gun against my temple,
to kill myself would be so simple.
Nothing more to live for,
Only my life to die for.
Written awhile ago:
Are these my tears rolling down my face?
Their bittersweetness that I taste?
Tears of joy, or tears of sorrow,
I wonder what they'll be tomorrow.
[ June 23, 2002: Message edited by: Beowulfthefallen ] |
|
| Back to top |
|
Molako_Plus
member
Member #
Joined: 25 Jan 2002
Posts: 290
Location: Toronto (Polska)
|
| Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2002 10:45 pm |
|
|
WomaN!...
You Stole my cat
and my hearT!!
Whoa-man!
 |
|
| Back to top |
|
Cleoric
member
Member #
Joined: 28 Feb 2002
Posts: 93
Location: Kelowna, BC, Canada
|
| Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2002 11:04 pm |
|
|
Well, I don't really like the first one. But I LOVE the second one. I'm gonna save that if it's alright with you 
And a poem for you
Zesty Taco corn chips
Floating in a mist of purple elephants.
I hang a rope off of my elbow
[ June 24, 2002: Message edited by: Cleoric ] |
|
| Back to top |
|
bellie
member
Member #
Joined: 09 Feb 2001
Posts: 63
Location: Sydney, NsW, Australia
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 24, 2002 2:36 am |
|
|
hehe i dunno about anyone else but i appreciate poetry its realli cool`` ive made quite a lot myself  but its more rap hehe i cant get my hadns on em at the moment though..
my thought is.. maybe you should base a picture on your poem and show us`` as well as anybody else? |
|
| Back to top |
|
Little Beefucker
member
Member #
Joined: 19 Nov 2001
Posts: 254
Location: US
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 24, 2002 4:57 am |
|
|
I find the biggest handicap in poetry is that it only fits a certain mood -- at least, where the general public is concerned. You can get away with quoting stuff from 400 years ago, but to say something new, in a movie or in a novel or elsewhere, often seems more pretentious than profound.
That said, I really love specific lines. Lines are quotable in any context, even when they're clearly pretentious.
I'm blabbing in general. No disrespect to your words. I quite like what you've done -- especially this bit: "to kill myself would be so simple." Would be awesome with a long B&W photo session of self portraits. Total misery. Good stuff, inspiring. ^_^
Depression is the best mood for art.
And here's my contribution, I wrote this a few years back on the inside of some notebook: No one is / more miserable / than the man / who says / he isn't. |
|
| Back to top |
|
eyewoo
member
Member #
Joined: 23 Jun 2001
Posts: 2662
Location: Carbondale, CO
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 24, 2002 5:47 am |
|
|
Here's one of mine...
Alley hater snappy whack
baski bye el bathy bub. |
|
| Back to top |
|
Sumaleth
Administrator
Member #
Joined: 30 Oct 1999
Posts: 2898
Location: Australia
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 24, 2002 7:53 am |
|
|
| (Moved to Random Musings) |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
