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Author   Topic : "Have I got a winner???? (Freelance Cop, Jhenna)"
Cicinimo
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Joined: 03 Mar 2001
Posts: 705
Location: Seattle

PostPosted: Tue May 22, 2001 2:59 pm     Reply with quote
Well, she's as complete as she's going to get. If you dont know the story, Kristen Perry (awesome illustrator/designer [url=http://www.merekatcreations)]www.merekatcreations)[/url] provided the line art for a coloring contest at the megatokyo forum (www.megatokyo.com). The mission was to color this picture as creatively and good as possible:


Needless to say, I went all out in coloring, and stretched the line art as far as I could take it. Here's my coloring Job:



I tried to tell a little story with it . Here are a few closeups for all those interested:




Please, C&C are always GREATLY appreciated. Tell me whatcha think, and what I shoulda done different.
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Poprocksz
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Joined: 08 May 2001
Posts: 497
Location: Transylvania

PostPosted: Tue May 22, 2001 3:14 pm     Reply with quote
I think ya got a winner......The face looks weird though.....it's the chin and the hair..
the shading on the face along the jaw line
is a little off too....the lips are different
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Jezebel
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Joined: 02 Nov 2000
Posts: 1940
Location: Mesquite, TX, US

PostPosted: Tue May 22, 2001 3:23 pm     Reply with quote
I saw this over in WiP and meant to comment on it but I totally forgot. I know you're finished with this but I was going to suggest a fairly easy fix. Right now the entire image is pretty high contrast with lots of colors jumping off all over the place. The girl really has to compete with the sky and the painted wall behind her for attention. The fact that the wall has a whole lot of texture on it also distracts from the girl. Maybe try tweaking a few things here and there to make her be more of a focal point to the image? It looks very nice though, I think her pants look cool... kinda like shiny blue vinyl or heavily starched jeans

[edit: added a crappy fix to show you sort of what I meant. I dunno if it's better or not though, I don't usually color line art I made her skin less orangey and defined her lips a little more as well.]

Original:



Tweaked:



[ May 22, 2001: Message edited by: Jezebel ]
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DiXter
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Joined: 17 Mar 2001
Posts: 622
Location: sweden

PostPosted: Wed May 23, 2001 3:06 am     Reply with quote
wow, very detailed!
I like it!
But it's her face.. it looks a bit wierd.
It's a tricky angle you have chosen.

If I were you I would add some texture on those cool looking jeans.
The shoes looks really good to!!

I think Jezebel has a good point, some of the colors looks ..eh, whats the word .. too glowing.

keep up the good work!
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neebhore
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Joined: 25 Jan 2001
Posts: 330
Location: UK

PostPosted: Wed May 23, 2001 7:16 am     Reply with quote
IMO, it looks pretty good. The problem with the face is the cheek, the shading should've started more to the right, to give it a more rounded feel. That's what i think, i'm often wrong though

[ May 23, 2001: Message edited by: neebhore ]
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ex
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Joined: 23 Mar 2000
Posts: 887
Location: USA

PostPosted: Wed May 23, 2001 12:30 pm     Reply with quote
I like the sketch alot. No opinion on the painting, sorry.

But I really do like the sketch. really.
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Merekat
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Joined: 26 Dec 2000
Posts: 164
Location: Toledo, OH USA

PostPosted: Wed May 23, 2001 12:42 pm     Reply with quote
Ah. good. I think I can comment here. With the circumstances what they are at MT, I didn't think I should remark on the entries until after the contest. BUT. *ahem*

I was really impressed with your creativity here, Jamie. REALLY. And yes, for being 15, you make me feel incredibly old and backwards, especially today (gah...26...sucks). If I had what you have at 15, I very well could be pulling down a Mullins's living. ;} Ah well...

Crits: I agree with Jezebel, your saturation levels are everywhere. and so too is your light source. If she's illuminated by a spotlight as you show from the copters, or even the dusk's light, she should be in a lot more shadow on the figure's front plane towards the viewer than she is. Her shadow on the right is very dark, yet the shading on the figure's right planes are quite similar to the highlights.

Textures, yes, too much. LOVE what's on that pipe in the front, but it's too much on the wall and the wall behind her. Try to avoid using the PS filters for texture, as it doesn't take into consideration perspective. I would suggest in the future, you create the wall as a flat rectangle with all the details and textures, then flatten and skew it into place. I've done this in my version, which you've yet to see.

The buildings are not in proper perspective, either. You know to make them smaller as the progress into the sky, but they are all seeming to be on different focal points rather than one main point from high above.

EXCELLENT job on the sky itself. I ADORE the colors. Bravo!

I LOVE the alien thingy there, too. perfect lighting, perfect contrast to not dominate and to remain in the background, and wonderful levels of detail.

copter's lights VERY cool.

Jhenna: she's very shiney. The gun, the gloves, the clothes, her skin almost glow at the same level of gloss. You have no matte finishes anywhere. The lighting problem from the source would help out a lot, but it's kinda out of place as is. For example, the underside of the gun should not be the same brightness level as the side of the light source. You're making things look flat by not allowing some information to be omitted.

Now, I'm all for the details. You know that. But sometimes it's better to leave some to the imagination, as all in nature isn't right there and loud for you to see, so everything in your realistic coloring shouldn't be either.

Now, the big BIG thing for me: the anatomy of the face. I know you don't have as good a grasp on structure, and you certainly didn't have my photo reference my coworker was kind enough to pose for, but there are some lovely things off there. First off, I never meant that second eye to show. In the lineart, that line between nose and hair is nothing but space. That's not skin you see behind it. And, I did notice some things that I myself had to change when I colored it. The nose is slightly off if you don't know the lighting, and that bottom lip shouldn't show that much. Big thing for you: that line between the nose and mouth should be severely faded back. And the shadow of the chin shouldn't curve up like that. Oh, and take another look at my linework for the neck. You're misplacing the musculature.

But you know what? I love it. And I wish you tons of luck in the contest. ;}

I can't wait to show you and the forum my version. But I can't do it until I know who the winner is... ;}
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Cicinimo
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Joined: 03 Mar 2001
Posts: 705
Location: Seattle

PostPosted: Wed May 23, 2001 1:27 pm     Reply with quote
Thankee for the complete response.

I was trying to get more saturated as opposed to my last photoshop painting. I guess I just need more control. Another thing, theres no photoshop filters here. I'm not saying it doesnt look skewed, but all the textures were done with the faux finish brushes. I kinda went crazy with 'em (hey, It was fun anyways). One think that annoyed me about it was that the sky was brighter than her. Probably not the biggest weakness, but I didnt like it, and couldnt do anything about it (darkening the sky or lightening her both looked weird).

My poor mind couldnt handle all the funky perspectives from things exsisting at 3 different levels, with a rat's view. A reference could have been soo nice . If only I lived in NY.

Thanks again for the constructive crit. If I sound like I'm trying to justify my mistakes, I'm surely not. The bad thing is, a bunch of my mistakes were also made on my last photoshop painting *sigh*. Well, atleast I improved in some areas.

Another thing: If you have time after this whole things over, might there be a chance that you could mess with my lighting a little bit and show me a little more what you mean? You proly dont have alot of time for that sort of thing, but if you do.

[ May 23, 2001: Message edited by: Cicinimo ]
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Merekat
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Joined: 26 Dec 2000
Posts: 164
Location: Toledo, OH USA

PostPosted: Wed May 23, 2001 5:11 pm     Reply with quote
;} no problem, Jamie. I'd be happy to help you out. But I will need over a week, as I'm counting the votes and I'm doing the grand prize personalizations AFTER I find out who won. So. After all that, if I don't remember, remind me, and no problem. ;} We'll get you to be a millionaire by 20 no problem. (just please put in a good word for me when you get there, yes?) ;}
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NextGen
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Joined: 24 Apr 2001
Posts: 149

PostPosted: Wed May 23, 2001 10:56 pm     Reply with quote
woohoo a fellow MegaTokyo lover ... I've been watchin them for a long time and it seems there plot is really getting messed up.. they really need to pick it up some. I've never visited there forum, just figured it was a bunch of fanboys. anyway i may stop by.

btw.. nice attention to detail.. had to make you go crazy...
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Freddio
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Joined: 29 Dec 1999
Posts: 2078
Location: Australia

PostPosted: Thu May 24, 2001 2:11 am     Reply with quote
You may have a chance to win with that.. good luck..

Yea the face is a little funny

try not to make the face too hard with deep ridges and so on. Guys have that, chics don't
see what I mean in my paint over.


Also the the picture has no focal point. So in my paintover I have blured out the sharp background and desatureted it. I cut out the myst because it detracts from the girl. Your eyes dont know what to look at if everything is the same sharpness.

I dont claim to be a pofessional artist, and know everything actually im not much older than you but these a few things which struck my eye. Hope that helps.

,


Touched up version (hmm accidentally saved it with a noise filter on hmm)




also maby go for a more dynamic lighting in your pic.. eg

heres a pic I coloured last last year.




But all up awesome coloring job you've done there. Wll done Keep up the great work.

[ May 24, 2001: Message edited by: Freddio ]
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Collosimo
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Joined: 30 Dec 2000
Posts: 551
Location: Brisbane, QLD, Australia

PostPosted: Thu May 24, 2001 2:34 am     Reply with quote
Nice... awesome lineart MereKat.

You wanted to go for some more saturation... I understand why you would want some level of saturation, but because of the huge variety of colours in this pic, oversaturation means it ends up looking like a finger painting.. lots of bright saturated colours all over the place...

You need to select a more refined pallete.. pehaps three main colours.. so that some unity and atmosphere/emotion.. can be identified.
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