[Socar MYLES]

I almost feel GUILTY posting such a hideosity on the same night as Enayla's pretty fellow. But I haven't felt well enough to do anything much, let alone draw, the last few days, and today, by some bizarre miracle, the pain is GONE, the annoying nausea caused by said pain is gone, and the weird sense of disorientation caused by the painkillers...is also gone. So I was at work, and I just had to make this latest addition to my self-made genre--Crappy Laptop Art:



They're mechanical rats, constructed of metal and living parts. There's been an error on the cyborg-rat assembly line today: Each of them, as can be seen, looks almost rat-like, but not quite. So, they've been abandoned, unfinished and furless, but able to think....

Poor rats.

EDIT: Heh...maybe I should've used THIS for Draw Club instead of this http://www.sijun.com/dhabih/ubb/Forum5/HTML/000839.html .....

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My old man's a dustman
'E wears a dustman's 'at
'E wears gorblimey trousers...
AAAAAAAAND....
'E lives in a council flat!

[This message has been edited by Socar MYLES (edited February 18, 2001).]

[Al_kgs]

Wow. Great job on the skin of those poor things, but why did you blur the shadows on the ground so much ...? it doesn't look very natural.

[Enayla]

Wheeh, I love them! I think they make a neat contrast to my picture actually

You've always had a talent with colours.

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��.if the world didn't suck we would all fall off.��

[SlightlyTwisted]

Awww, so cute!

I think they're adorable, with their little marks on their hind legs, like mad, twisted pound puppies. I want one!

Your handwriting looks exactly like mine... freaky. Did you ever get the 'looks like a spider with ink on it's feet walking across a page' remark from your English teacher?

[Socar MYLES]

Yep. I was forever being told to shape up or ship the hell out of English class as a kid.... My dad finally got me a printer when I was eight.

...Adorable...?

They're an illustration for this horror story I'm writing.... (I have a creative writing class this term, and, to my great shock and delight, the professor actually LIKES splat horror.) I'll post the story when I'm done.

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My old man's a dustman
'E wears a dustman's 'at
'E wears gorblimey trousers...
AAAAAAAAND....
'E lives in a council flat!

[SlightlyTwisted]

Haha, yeah, I got the same response, only with a thick Scottish accent. The printer was my best buddy in school, and written exams were the bane of my existance.

Well, I think they're adoradble. But you know I have rather warped sensibilities, so don't be discouraged by my fondness for the little fellows.

Can't wait to see the story!

[Socar MYLES]

And...the story: http://www.gorblimey.com/rubbish/poorrats.html

I've got to read it next Tuesday, so any feedback's much appreciated. (And anyone who wants to read it FOR me....) All right, I'm not really THAT lazy.

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My old man's a dustman
'E wears a dustman's 'at
'E wears gorblimey trousers...
AAAAAAAAND....
'E lives in a council flat!

[SlightlyTwisted]

I love the story.

My only bit of criticism is this line, here:

The next step was supposed to be a slow, staggered flipping of switches, intended to switch on the mechanical and organic brains

The repetition of the word 'switch' seems a tad clumsier than it could be, and will only appear more so when read aloud. I'd change the second one to something else. 'Turn on', 'activate', or whatever. Maybe something vaguely computer related, such as 'boot up'.

I'd also add an additional something involving Nelson between the part with the food processor and his attempted escape. As it is, he seems a bit detached from the whole thing once he's had his encounter with the whirring utensil. It doesn't need to be much, just a quick line or two tucked in somewhere. Maybe the rats antagonizing him some more, or maybe just brief insight into his fear or pain.

Other than that, I really, really like it. Marvellous stuff. I'll be humming Greensleeves for days, now.

[DirtyDigger]

I had hamsters as a kid and this is what their babies looked like.

Nicely rendered


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"I Hear High Heels!" - DirtyDigger

[Jason]

Had gerbals when I was a kid. got a call from my mom calling me home from school. my little bro pulled the dresser over and they had gotten loose. After about a week the room realy started to smell. Took us about a month befor we found the the second one. It was smashed behind the dresser. Its little body hanging about half way down the wall, were it was plasterd when the dresser was pushed back up against the wall. ITs blood glued it there, little tail and legs dangling. My father cleaned it up becouse I was so mortified by the site.
Thanks for the memorys.
jason
www.fordanimation.com

[Kreuze]

I read your story (and I usually don't read ones on the net, something about staring at a monitor instead of a book page.) Great premise, I really like the setup too. Something about ending/payoff didn't seem as strong as it could be, I didn't really get a building sense of dread. Also the rats did seem/look too cute & feeble to be scary to me.
Just thought I'd let you know someone read your story

PS. your DrawClub picture deserved more replies, it's discouraging when pics like that get less attention than "NewBies first 20 minute coloring"

[Socar MYLES]

Thanks for the crits on the story. I never even noticed the two 'switch'es in that sentence. *Slaps self* Duh.

Sorry about the memories, Jason. Didn't mean to call up squished-gerbil associations.

My stupid ex-husband once stuck a hairless rat in the scanner, and it died an hour later, freezing cold with shock, coughing blood, et cetera. That was pretty horrible, too....

Okay, enough heinous stuff.

Ah.... I got a rose for Valentine's day....

Oreo cookies.

Blah.

Sorry.

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My old man's a dustman
'E wears a dustman's 'at
'E wears gorblimey trousers...
AAAAAAAAND....
'E lives in a council flat!